Why I Will and Why I Won’t

After weeks of leaning back and forth, I have finally come to what I believe is an informed and well reasoned decision in my vote for US President in 2008. I realize that this can be a controversial subject. I realize that this will go against some in my church community. I realize there is just as much brow beating and proselytizing in politics as there is in Christian theology. But I think it is important for us to be able, as a community of believers, as followers of Christ, and as citizens, to openly discuss our views and to openly accept as valid the views of those with whom we may disagree. In that spirit, I want to lay out why I have decided to vote for McCain-Palin and why I won’t vote for Obama-Biden.

At the start of all this, I really wanted to vote for Obama-Biden. In fact, earlier in the year I would say that this ticket had my vote. Probably, as recently as two weeks ago, I was still leaning in their direction. Over the last 2 months I have found myself wavering back and forth between the two sides, sometimes a couple times a week. I was seeing good things from both sides of which I wanted to be a part. Because of my wavering and because of my genuinely feeling like I was mostly unsettled on which candidate to chose, I upped the intensity of my search to understand each side in depth. I’ve read more print. I’ve watched more news. I’ve looked at more websites. And I have intentionally tried to expose myself 50/50 to both more liberal sources and more conservative sources. It is this search that has allowed me to come down solid on the side of McCain-Palin. And it really does not have much to do with the “traditional” conservative or Christian issues of abortion, stem cell research, same sex marriage, blah, blah, blah. It has much more to do with a fundamental difference between the two sides on the way they think about the US.

I’ve looked at plenty of sources from Christian guys whom I respect such as Brian McLaren who have openly stated their support for Obama-Biden. In fact, I have been pleasantly surprised by the number of Christians who are openly supporting this camp. I think it is good for there to be room in Christianity for that which is other than “right wing” Republican. Most of these guys cite reasons for their support that center around justice for the poor, concern for the environment, a stance that uses force as a last resort in the world, and a recognition that US imperialism is not necessarily a good thing. We are not God’s “anointed nation” in the world, therefore justifying everything we do in the world as “God’s work.” I agree with all that. These are very critical issues, and I believe in all of them. I believe that we need to work on all of them. And I follow right along with Obama-Biden on the importance that they place on them. But I still won’t vote for them.

Now I am not voting for McCain-Palin because they have all the right answers to these issues. They don’t. But I do believe that they understand that these issues have critical importance to us and our world. I do think that these issues are on their radar in a big enough way. And I don’t think that John McCain is just another George Bush. President Bush has done a lot of good, especially on Home Land Security, but he has also struggled big time in several areas not the least of which is Irag. But Mr. McCain is a smart, solid, honest guy who understands where President Bush made mistakes and will work like a dog to correct them. But while I do feel the Senator McCain is a solid guy, I wouldn’t say that he is my ideal candidate, and I do think in some ways that my vote is more against Obama-Biden than it is for McCain-Palin. So why?

In short, Senator Obama is trying to bring about socialism. Plain and simple. His confession about “wealth redistribution” reveals what he truly thinks. And I don’t believe that socialism works on a large scale. I fully understand that early Christian communities were basically socialist in many ways, and that it worked well for them. And in small groups, I am willing to consider that socialism may even be a better way. But there are plenty of examples, even in small groups such as the first Plymouth colonies, where socialism was tried and abandoned because of failure. And in large groups, while I am aware that there are examples of socialism working as a form of government (some Eastern European countries for example), there are also plenty of examples of socialism leading to wide-scale human atrocities (Lenin, Stalin, Marx for example). Many would even say that socialism is just the first step towards communism, and that is certainly something of which I want no part as a form of government.

I have wondered why people in high places of government would want socialism. Is it because they are truly genuinely concerned about humanity and believe that this is the best way to get at the common good? I suppose that could be their motive. That would be the right motive. And I think that is what most of the outspoken Christian leaders have as their motive. But honestly, I think they are being fooled by the Obams-Biden rhetoric. I think they are believing in a hollow promise. I think the rhetoric is a sham. Government types want socialism because it brings them power. More power than they have now. And the thirst and lust for power is just as strong as the thirst and lust for money. So the saying goes, “How much is enough? Just a little bit more.” Socialism in government brings power to those in charge. And I am not willing to give them that much power. I don’t trust them with it.

So why else am I against socialism. I am against socialism because it removes individual responsibility. The government has all the power so it is the entity that becomes responsible. Socialism allows people to live on an excuse. It allows us to say it is not my fault. It removes our incentive to work hard and get better and fight against the injustice. It allows us to say that we don’t have to work hard to get better. It allows us to say that there is no value in the struggle. It falsely tells us that we can live without struggle and without pain and without effort. Socialism brings the false hope that it is a panacea for all that ails us. Those things are in this world, and they will always be a part of this world until its Creator brings it to rights himself. We can and should try to make it better. But I don’t think socialism is the best platform from which to start.

I fully realize that capitalism is not a panacea either. It has a tendency to make the rich richer and the poor poorer. It tends to kick those that are already down. In a lot of ways, it fosters consumption and greed. It can take our focus off the environment because we see it as a tool to use rather than for which something to care. It can bring about injustice for the sick and needy because of the fallacy that maybe they are getting what they deserve.  But our current system also fuels ingenuity and hard work and personal responsibility.  And I think that is a better foundation from which to tackle the issues that have been named above.

In closing, yes we have problems in the US and in the world that are very complex  and that need novel global solutions from a collaboration of all of us. But we need to be careful and cautious about how we approach those problems and solutions because while those solutions may in fact fix the current problems, along with those solutions will come a whole new set of problems. Both McCain-Palin and Obama-Biden are aware of the problems. Neither side is refusing to see them. And both are offering solutions. And in the end, I feel that the Obama-Biden solution package is just too dangerous. The new problems that would potentially come from their set of socialistic solutions have way too great a cost.

What Kind of Christian?

I saw a sign on Saturday that saddened me a bit. It was along the route I was driving to get to my son’s final football game of the regular season (they are undefeated at 7-0). The marquis out front of a small church read the following: “Come in if you love Jesus. Anybody can honk.” I’m sure the people who put together those words felt that they were being clever and cute and bit funny. But I think it speaks to the mindset that exists in many mainstream American “evangelical” congregations. And to be honest, the thinking that is behind those words is one of the things that led me to leave that kind of church in search of another kind of church.

I think it’s sad when the church starts to think about people as “us” and “them.” This sign excludes. It divides people into those that love Jesus and those that do not. And then it takes a step further and says to those that do not indentify themselves as Jesus lovers to stay away. I would even venture out on a bit of a limb and say that behind those words lies a bit of elitism. That Jesus lovers are good and those that don’t love Jesus are bad. I don’t know what this church is trying to accomplish, but what they are saying to the world is that they are all about excluding and separating. And that certainly is not what Jesus is about.

Now it may very well be that those words were placed carelessly without much thought about the negative message that I am picking up from them. I realize that another way to look at it is that loving Jesus is much more than just a friendly honk. But it is sad to me than not enough thought went into those words so that what I believe is the greater negative message was realized. I believe it speaks to the “us good” and “them bad” mentality that seems to dominate much of Christianity. When we believe that God is coming to wisk us away to some spiritual existence and take us from these evil bodies and this evil world and when our theology is largely based on avoiding sin, I think this is where we end up, with “us” and “them.” When instead we realize that God is all about and in the process of redeeming his entire creation and bringing heaven to earth to some day heal all that is already good but broken, finally bringing the world to rights, then we join in the work of restoring all that is here and including everyone in that work.

I sometimes check out the naked pastor blog. He recently had a post that deals a bit with this. Check it out at http://nakedpastor.com/archives/2361. I will copy a quotation from it here:

“The evangelicals I’ve felt the most fond of, the most comfortable around, and the most commonality with– regardless of political, social, or philosophical differences– were the ones who never tried to sell me on Jesus yet always seemed to be trying to live the life Jesus desired of them. The paradox of lifestyle evangelism is that while it might sound like a Christian’s loving, friendly actions are all driven by an ulterior motive, it only really clicks when they’re able to let go of that motive. The people who made the best case for Christianity were the ones who were genuinely unconcerned whether I ever decided to become a Christian or not.”

This was taken from a book written by a Jewish agnostic, Daniel Radosh, whose work, Rapture Ready: Adventures in the Parellel Universe of Christian Pop Culture, is referenced in the piece at the above link. While I have never read the book, I think this statement speaks volumes. As followers of Christ we are to emulate him in our life and work. He did not exclude. He did not label “us” and “them.” He loved. He gave mercy. He scandalized with grace. He did not keep a list of sins. He did not force himself on anyone. He was not ‘in your face.’ Isn’t that what we are supposed to be doing? I think it is.

Christ does not need us to save others for him. He can do it himself. He invites us to join him in this part of the work of bringing his kingdom to earth, bringing heaven to earth. Our job is not to save and then raise well educated and proper theologized and well adjusted Chrisitians. Our job is to love people. Christ does the rest.

…that strange same old place again…

It has been some time since I last blogged. I’m not sure why. Just haven’t felt like it. I’ve been reading other blogs and commenting on many and have found quite a few new ones that are very interesting, but my soul has been quiet on anything that I felt I might post here. Maybe some inner calmness. And you know what calmness is said to proceed…

So I find myself in that strange same old place again. That place I have found myself now for about the 4th time I think in the last 20 years or so. It almost seems to be a cycle for me. And as I leave this place of which I speak I seem to have a great deal of growth, spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, relationally. But that growth then seems to level off, and then after a time I find myself back here. I’m not sure if I lose ground or not because it seems like the cycle keeps advancing me along. And every time I stand here I seem to do so more boldly and yet with more grace and more patience with myself. It feels familiar now. But I don’t quite know why or how I get myself back here.

The place of which I speak is that place where I am challenged, whether by myself or by someone else (but mostly probably by myself), to examine if God is really true. Does he really exist? Or is it just all psychological gaming? It seems that I grow and then I cruise along for a bit and then life experiences of my own and the rest of the world get me thinking and being skeptical and doubting and so I find myself back here again searching to put my feet back on something that is solid. I think I am a child of the post-modern age and thought for sure, but I’ve never intended to be that. It just is that.

The last 2 of these cycles have involved me in some way investigating a bit of atheism. In fact, I think that is where it started both times. The last time I was here back in 2006 I began reading The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins, a well known atheist and evolutionary biologist. I was not in such a solid place with my faith, really doubting, really cynical, fed up with church, fed up with a vindictive portrait of God, fed up with trying to be holy and always failing. Not wanting to abandon my faith, about half way through I also started reading Mere Christianity again (it had been since college), and it saved me. It restored my belief in God and the two books together lit a spark in me of trying to rediscover who God really is. That led me to more CS Lewis and then to Breakthrough and then to Brian McLaren and Jim Palmer and Rob Bell and NT Wright and Paul Fitzgerald and Paul Hill and Wheatland. And then I felt almost burned out. Weary. A bit tired of people telling me I may be wrong in the direction my faith was going. I quit blogging and just rested and tried not to stir up any trouble. I really just wanted some solitude I think.

And then again it started up recently. I got into a discussion with some atheists online. And you know, those guys are smart. Really smart. I know there are some lacking smartness just like there are Christians and Muslims and Hindus and Buddhists who tend to be more fanatical than smart. But for the most part, atheists are very well thought out on why they believe or don’t believe. I respect that. I want to understand my beliefs in that way. I don’t want what I believe to be something that I just carried with me from those who influenced me as a child. If I can, I want to own it and have evidence for it and think rightly about it. So I guess I am not doubting my belief so much as I am wanting to find solid footing for it. For me, it has to be based on more than just a statement of personal anecdotal experience. That seems to me like the default position when no other arguments hold up. It’s like saying, “God told me to do it.” That’s using God as a trump card. Who can say anything against that? It slams the discussion shut. And to me it feels weak.

In my review of atheism, it is clear to me that they do have faith. Most of them claim to believe only in that for which there is scientifically generated evidence. But that is a form of faith in and of itself. They must have faith that nothing exists beyond the empiric. And if there is something beyond the empiric, they will miss it because they are not even open to it. If God does exist, he is certainly beyond provability with scientific experimentation. But that doesn’t mean that there may not exist evidence for God. It is that solid evidence that I desire on which to find solid footing. But that evidence I think is for another post.

I came across an interesting blog called de-conversion. It is specifically for Christians who are deconverting from Christianity to atheism, and it is fascinating to read their stories. There seems to be a lot of anger and disillusionment there which has to indicate something. I’m not sure what. Most of that disillusionment is about coming to a place where Christianity was not working for them. They were getting what I like to call “religious speak” that sounds nice but is really full of nothing. It’s hollow. It’s stuff like, “You just need to have more faith.” Empty. How do you even do that? Have more faith. Do you just will more faith for yourself? Or the standard stuff like, “You need to pray more or read your Bible more or have more God time or spend more time at church.” That is all so weak. It does nothing. Absolutely nothing to help someone who is skeptical about their beliefs and feels lost. I agree wholeheartedly with those “de-cons” (their word for themselves off their website) that these kinds of anwers are crap.

Many of them also came to a point where they felt like the Bible was just a bunch of contradictory narratives about a vindictive, brutal God. They had questions about how a supposedly loving God could send people to an eternal hell for eternal torment just because they didn’t ever have a chance to know him. They had questions about how a supposedly loving God of mercy and grace could support genocide and infanticide and murder. They had questions about how good, rigorous science could uncover things like evolution and a really old earth and relativity and quantum mechanics which all have very good evidence for being active in our world and then being told by their Christian mentors that this does not fit with Genesis so they better just stuff their intellect and live on a faith that then seemed almost ridiculous. So they abandoned what didn’t fit together and what nobody helped them fit together because they got the crap answers I already listed in the previous paragraph and went with what did make sense, the empiric. And they embraced atheism. And I understand absolutely how they got there because I have been in their shoes on that same path multiple times now. And now I am standing here again.

All this makes me wonder if the Christianity that has been handed down through the generations is all that correct. If it does as much to turn people away from God as it does to turn them toward him, maybe there is something that we screwed up. Maybe we worship our Christianity and idolize it more than we worship God. Maybe we have boxed God into a neat little package with our various theologies and we actually worship the package instead of God. It is tragic to me that the people on “de-conversion” were not offered a big enough picture of God to allow for their doubts, to allow for their questions. I believe that God is bigger than our traditional Christianity has made him out to be, and I am determined to know that God.

So I have pieces that I am trying to put together. And I have pieces that I don’t know where they fit. And the answer is bigger than “just having more faith.” And I will keep studying and searching and talking with an awful big God about how he wants my faith to look.

Things I am currently considering on this journey:

1. God is not threatened by my doubts and questions.
2. God is not threatened by good science. I plan to read Alister McGrath’s new book, The Open Secret, about his ideas on Natural Theology to explore this more.
3. How does a reading of Genesis and evidence for evolution and a multi-billion year old earth fit together? Good science and the Bible ought to fit together, not work against each other.
4. The Old Testament was not written for me. I am not Jewish. I am reading How To Read The Bible For All  It’s Worth to help me understand the Bible better. How is the Old Testament supposed to relate to me?
5. What does the New Testament really say about hell? Real Live Preacher on his blog is discussing this.
6. What does the New Testament really say about salvation?
7. How can I help people who have doubts like me when I have so many big gaping holes myself?
8. How can I help my boys understand God when I have so many big gaping holes myself?
9. Why do I have so many questions and doubts in the first place?
10. Why is it so important for me to own so personally what I believe on a solid footing?
11. How do I repeatedly end up in this spot?
12. And ……………..

Enough for now. My brain is hurting.